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Monte Ne Chicken House is the place to rock. It is the place where they buy food to eat. Since 1996, the manliest men
of Christ on Campus have ventured to the strange land of Monte Ne to feast in this farm implement-laden Inn. We do so in obedience
to the biblical commandment of Acts 10:13, feasting uponst endless bowls of fried chicken, smashed taters, beans of the green
variety, corn of the blessed fields, piping hot bread from the ovens of life, apple butter churned by nomads of the ancient
forest, the colest slaw you ever done set your eyes upon, and one, yes, one bowl of bean soup per person. In this way, we
honor those who came before us and deal with the overpopulation of chickens in Arkansas "a mismo tiempo."
NOTE ON RECORDS: some bowl sizes were smaller in the early years, such that the cole slaw bowl of today, for
example, is 50% larger than the cole slaw bowl of 1996. I distinguish these records by putting the word "old" in front of
records made with the older, smaller bowls. One and a half "new" bowls of cole slaw would equal three of the "old" bowls.
The same goes for corn and green beans. The rest are the same. Now, go forth and feast like heathen kings of old. Thank
you.
--Jeff Miller
CHICKEN -- 15 Pieces --- Ricky Rankin
COLE SLAW -- 3 "old" table-serving bowls -- Jeff Miller
BREAD -- 4 1/3 loaves -- Ryan Nelson
BUTTER -- 21 butter packets -- Mark Osmack
CRACKERS -- 43 packets (86 crackers) -- Lance Hall
CORN -- 1 1/2 "old" table-serving bowls -- Ben Johnson
GREEN BEANS -- 2 "old" table-serving bowls -- Craig Nelson
APPLE BUTTER -- 3 tubs -- Jeff West
FLY EATING -- 1 fly baked in a loaf of bread -- Don Helt
VOMITING -- 1 vomit -- Don Helt
SALT/PEPPER -- 1 salt shaker, 1 pepper shaker -- Carl Wiltse
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The city of Monte Ne was originally a Utopian dream built inside a cement pyramid. When Beaver Lake was created, the
cement pyramid floated away forever, leaving only a handful of hungry people and many, many tasty chickens running to
and fro. The Monte Ne Inn preps these fine chickens in boiling juices, just for you! For reservations call 636-5511. Open
evenings 5-8, Sunday at noon, closed Mondays. Note: farm tools on the walls are not for sale.
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